New Year's Eve

First and foremost, a belated Merry Christmas.

This December had been both quiet and busy. Since I started my cake business in mid November, there was some orders and I kinda was happy that it was not too much. Yeah, maybe that sounds a bit weird. Everybody loves big orders every day and especially with December. Probably because I just started and my oven is still a very small one, I believe the amount of orders I got in December was just the perfect amount. Otherwise I might be overstressed with everything else that's also happening at work.

It's New Year's Eve. One year has passed in something that felt like a wink. So many lessons and laughter, so many ups and downs. And for the first time in December I have not really been partying nor food fests like all those years, but today is New Year's Eve, it's a time I make an exception to everything like: going into big crowds, go wild and go crazy.

There is just something about Suriname's New Year's Eve. Maybe it's the smell of fireworks, the seeing of old friends, who you haven't seen in ages, the drinking with complete strangers, who are willing to share their bottle of alcohol. And the rain?? Nobody cares about the rain, but it's preferably after you're already at the spot you wanted to be. I believe most people see the rain as a kind of blessing, a shower from heaven.

It's still 9:30 in the morning and streets are still quiet and the sun is shining, but once it hits 11am, then the crowd has risen from their needed rest to go through the many hours of partying.

I still need to decide what to do today. Will it be Pagara Estafette Downtown or Pagara Estafette North? Shall I go to Galaxy after that or Instyle? Choices, choices......even the last day of 2014, choices need to be made.

So for 2015, I wish you all get the right guidance to make the right choice!! It might be that one decision that might change the course of your life!!

Sweets: reasons to eat cake!

On November 13, 2014 I officially launched my cake page on Facebook: Sweets!!
Had been thinking about it for a while and been working on my logo and finally last Thursday, it felt like the perfect moment to launch it.

Associated with the launch, I will be giving away a cake on November 19!! The requirement to participate is to like & share the page and give a reason why you should win it. Check my page Sweets for further details.

Whenever people read 'reasons', the first thing that comes to mind :' is it my birthday or someone else's birthday?'. But the whole idea of this requirement is to let people think about why they should have cake.

There are a lot of reasons to eat cake and whenever it's free, all the better.

Like mini temptations  has its top 10 here, I will also create my own top 10 reasons why you should have cake:

1. Everybody can use something sweet in their life.(that's why my page is called Sweets!!)
2. It makes a perfect combination with your cup of hot beverage.
3. It's like the cherry on top of a balanced diet

4. You're alive!! It's something worth celebrating and celebration means cake!!
5. It's someone's birthday (didn't your neighbor's dog became 2?), graduation, achievement, retirement....just fill in the blanks.
6. The most standard flavors are vanilla, strawberry and chocolate. But actually, there are hundreds of cake flavors and textures to choose from. Check here for the countries with their cakes. ( the most interesting one: Better than s3x cake. I definitely should check the recipe of that one!)
7. They come in various sizes and forms: cake pops, cupcakes, bundt, round, square, sculpted. Even life-size cakes exist.
8. It's good to give in to temptations sometimes, especially the sweet ones. Repressed emotions (towards sweet) might result in a disastrous outcome ( pig out party!!)
9. It gives your meal a happy ending. :)
10. It always brings a smile to whoever receives it.

https://zanegrava.wordpress.com/2011/03/

That's my top 10. Do you know any more reasons why you should have cake, please share!

Food for thought: Inferno

Spoiler Alert!! Unless you have already read this book or you don't mind spoilers, otherwise please be warned that the end of Dan Brown's book 'Inferno' will be discussed in this post.

I've finished this book for a while, but the recent events have made me think about it again.

I like Dan Brown's book, because the author likes to use certain facts in his books. Mostly I read his books in front of a computer, so that I can Google anything that I'd might want to make sure it is actually true. After reading his books, it always keeps my thoughts busy for several days; wondering if what's written actually might be true or that what we've been told all these years is the supposed truth. His best work for me is still his previous one: The Lost Symbol! I finished it within 3 days (if not earlier) and it kept me thinking for days and discussing the ideas with people around me.

I was so excited when I heard of this new book and still, it took me several times to start and at the end actually kept reading. To be honest, I had hoped it'd topped The Lost Symbol, but unfortunately it was good, but not that good.

But back to why it suddenly kept my mind busy again. Lately, the world has been in a whirlwind of illnesses. In Suriname, mostly troubled by Chikungunya and globally, everyone's shocked with the recent developments of Ebola.


This book's about how the main character, Robert Langdon, is part of the crew to prevent a global threat from an intellectual organization. This organization's biggest fear is overpopulation in the world and which they are trying to prevent. This book made it appear that virusses and illnesses are brought into the world to prevent overpopulation from happening. In the end, the airborne virus spread in the book was one to make random people infertile, but what if in the real world, some maniac had actually created the Ebola-virus to eliminate part of the world population? In their minds, they are doing the world a favor.

The movie: The end of the world

I gotta admit, seeing the amount of people growing in the world, there is a possibility that at a certain point the world might be overpopulated. In history, time and time again, there had been reasons to believe that the world might end (according to many, Y2K would've been the end and we're 14 year further), but every time a solution came up for whatever it threatened it. Or who knows, maybe the world was reset without us knowing that a button was pushed at a certain point in our lives.

Who knows me is aware that I'm not religious, but I do believe that everything happens for a reason. However hope is often delayed disappointment, but sometimes it's all there is to cling on. And when it comes to illnesses, a cure will be found it's just whether you'll live long enough to know about it.

Rotary agenda: keeping your appointments booked deliciously

Starting at elementary school, I was told about the importance of an agenda, but the excitement didn't last till the first week of school. For me, the fun part of having an agenda was making it nice with all kinds of clippings from my idols and cute stuff. The next thing that made it interesting was that I could pass it to all my fellow classmates to check it out and put in their contact information and eventually some comments. And that I could put appointments, test dates and my test marks in it, was a nice add-on, but surely not the main focus of an elementary student.

Now, being in the work field for more than a decade (and a tad older and forgettable), I see the importance of having an agenda. My mind just doesn't seem to hold on to that much information anymore. But I have to admit, I don't usually use an agenda, because I don't like how it's so plain and boring. It's just a hard cover with pages of paper to write on. And I don't see myself doing the clipping thing anymore.
 

 

 

 
So, when my friend Marieke Visser send me a Rotary agenda, I was kinda skeptic. I mean, I'm flattered that she's so nice to have thought of me and I'm really thankful for that, but I was not sure I'm gonna use it (thoughts about boring and plain). So when I finally got it in my hands, I was really impressed. She knows I love food, so with a theme as 'What's Cooking?', you kinda already caught my attention. And I'm not saying this because I got it as a gift. I really liked it because of these reasons:
 

 
1. It has different features:

  - an agenda to book all your appointments (duh....)
  - a calendar
  - and since the calendar is made in a stand-up way, you can lay it on your office to scroll the pages or use it as a table calendar or really bring it with you as a normal agenda.
 
2. Promote Suriname

This agenda contains a lot of information about Suriname: the food, the raw ingredients, the food events. This would be a perfect gift for tourists or foreign business partners. It's professional, the quality of the product is good, you're supporting a good cause and you're promoting the pride of being a Surinamese. And if you might be in a conversation with someone, who doesn't know Suriname, you can always show the pictures in the agenda itself, so make sure you get yourself one.
 
3. Good cause

Every year the Rotary initiates this agenda project and all generated income will be used for a good cause. To keep it interesting, a different theme will be chosen every year.
 

If you're interested (which you must be), you can buy it at:
- Readytex, Maagdenstraat 44-48
- Icana, lobby Hotel Torarica, Mr. L.J. Rietbergplein 1
- Randoe Woninginrichting, Dr. Sophie Redmondstraat 250.

 

If you need additional information about this agenda or anything else related to it, you can contact: 

Cees Dilweg, cadilweg@randoe.com / Tel.: 442958 / Mobiel: 0880 6419

Each agenda will be sold for SRD 62,50 (about $18,-) and the income will be used for several Rotary projects as indicated in their press release.
 
And this agenda came really at the right time, since I'm going to take my cake hobby to the next step soon and now I have somewhere to book all the cake orders!!

 **My apologies since my pictures really doesn't give the agenda justice, but I hope you understand that it's made with a simple Blackberry and by a non-photographer**


 

It's my life!!!

I quess every new year's day I try to pick up my blogs. Hoping to keep my new year's resolution longer than one day, but every year I notice that it lasted only one day. Some blogs even never got published . But the best thing out of it, is that I can read back  what my thoughts were and realize how I've matured as a person. This is something I wrote several years back:

-----
There are phases in life, where you will come to a point that decisions need to be made, paths be chosen and no pressure....course of your life need to be set. However everybody gets a certain preview of how life will be or could be, but nobody gets a How-to on any of this. Unless you have someone that has paved your path and your throne is waiting for you at a certain point in your life, you'll have to face these important points in your life.

However some parents might want to try to prepare you for it, but there's just no way they can see in the future what obstacles you might face. They do what they believe is right; save money for a great education, try to inspire you towards a bright future, some even believe pointing you towards their ideal job is what's best for you. But maybe it's just me, but don't we all come to a point where we have a feeling we're wasting our time? I've experienced it twice in my life. Once was when I graduated from pre-college and had to decide what to study. Soon enough I had to admit that the chosen major was nothing for me at all. Now I graduated from college, I face the same struggle again.
I thought getting older and wiser would take that away, but somehow it just seemed worse.
-----
After graduating valedictorian of my year, I felt lost. Lost because I didn't  know what my next goal is or should be. I've always worked out of survival. Even now...I'm not sure I love my job, but I feel challenged and that's good enough  for now.

I dont know why, but I have a feeling 2020 is going to be a game changer for me. I hate to have expectations, because I  hate it more to get  disappointed, but  this feels like something big is coming my way and without reason I'm feeling excited. And for those who are still lost, sometimes it's ok to let yourself go and just let the flow take you where you're supposed to be.

What if....

Recently things are not going that great in my life. Not that it's that bad, but things are happening and that's just part of life. But that doesn't take away the fact that these situations make me think about a lot of things. And what I know about feeling blue is that you need to do something about it.

I have different methods when I'm feeling blue. It could be that I pamper myself with a spa day or foodie day(which however has results that make me less happy), have an intensive workout or I try to motivate myself. This time I tried the latter.

Like what I said earlier in one of my posts and based on the lessons of NLP (Neuro-Linguistic Programming): " If you do what you've always done, you'll get what you've always got". And according to these studies, even sadness and blues has a starting point. If you'd like to go back to a time when you were happier, think about what you did different. What changed?

Recently I've been reading 'How to think like Leonardo da Vinci- Summary'. It's a summary about the principles on which the great genius based his ideas. Those are:

1. Curiosity - the quest for continuous learning
2. Demonstration - Test knowledge through practical experience
3. Sensation- Constantly sharpen the senses
4. Sfumato - be comfortable with ambiguity
5. Art/Science- balance science and art, logic and imagination
6. Corporality develop Poise - the balance of body and mind
7. Connection- maintain a big picture perspective

I have to admit I'm not such a quick reader or at least, I'd like to let all the words sink in, so I'm still at just principle #2, but it's so enlightening that I feel I had to share with you guys.


The first principle is curiosity and I felt so touched by it, since I'm the same way. I'm constantly looking for things I don't know and especially with the existence of Google, which is making searching information that much easier.

People does say 'Curiosity killed the cat', but on the other hand ' satisfaction brought it back'. With curiosity I don't mean nosing in other people's business, but the longing for knowledge. Like seeing a balloon deflate for the first time and wonder what happened. Or how certain liquids mixed together create a different color.

But in this summary, I've learned a new meaning to the question: 'What if...'.  And I believe somehow I've always used principle #2: demonstration. I couldn't wait to test it out, so I asked my colleagues some simple questions like:
- 'What if you could have all the money in the world, what would you do?'
- 'What if you could do anything you want, what is it that you'd most likely do?'

These questions seem very easy, but the results were shocking!! Most people actually don't know what they'd do if they got the freedom to do anything and if they'd have all the money in the world, they wouldn't know what to do and where to start.

To make it more interesting, I'd like to share a test with you:

1. Choose a subject/topic. It can be a pencil, a word like love or anything that comes in mind at that moment.
2. In 10 minutes ( can be longer or shorter), write down every thing that comes to mind about this subject/topic. Even things that doesn't seem to link with the word; it does for you.
3. Screen what you've written. What belief or perception do you see behind all that you've written.
4. After you know what your belief or perception is, understand why you have this kind of belief or perception.

I did this exercise with my colleague and her belief is that she had to find meaning in life. And let me first say this " No belief is wrong". It is based on your experiences and your environment. My mom always told us that if you don't work, you don't eat. So I grew up holding on to that idea.

And what I did after this exercise was using the 'what if ' - questions; What if you don't need to work to get rich?', 'What if you could get paid for doing something that you love to do'. For most ladies, these might be the questions:
'What if I could eat whatever I want and whenever I want and not gain any weight?'
'What if I could have a perfect skin without using any products'
'What if I could have any guy I want, who would it be?
'What if....'

Some might see it as daydreaming and ' too good to be true', but WHAT IF...these are the things that keep you from achieving just that?
What if......

You stole my heart,...Aruba!

Last year, after my internship in Aruba, everybody was asking me for advice on what to do in Aruba and I believed I promised several people a blog would follow. But days...months...passed, until I even come back after a 2nd visit and I believe I should really stop procrastinating about it and just do what I promised.

Aruba is a country that has a special place in my heart, not only the beach and the sea, but the friendly people and especially my friends. I couldn't visit most of them this year, but I'm sure our paths will cross somewhere in the future.

Aruba is known for most as the 'Happy Island' and I did indeed experienced that, every day of my internship and vacation. It is not the big things, but the small details or things that makes so much difference like greeting. Every where you go, you will be greeted. It's so natural for them to be friendly that it makes me wonder why people are so hard on greeting and smiling. Even if I walked by someone, who was just so happen in their yard, they'll wave and say 'Bon dia', which means 'Good Morning'.

Last year, I arranged my internship and took a daring step to travel to a Country I've never been and stayed there for 6 months. The best thing that happened to me is that I get introduced to Joenne Nicastia through a very good friend. Joenne is a lady, who takes measures into her own hands and was always willing to give advice. I wanted to rent an apartment before I would actually arrive in Aruba, but she advised me not to do so, since a picture can be deceiving and other worries need to be taken into account. However Aruba is small, but not everywhere is convenient to get hold of a bus and renting a car was not within my reach yet.

I arrived on a national holiday, so since the moment I arrived she took me everywhere to see apartments. Some were really ridiculously priced- a small studio with everything packed in it could easily cost 1000 florin (nearly $600,-) per month. Finally, I found a nice apartment( a real apartment, where you have a small living room, open kitchen, full bathroom and a bedroom), where every area is divided nicely and gave me a feeling that after a hard day of work, I can really relax.

Not only did she assist me in the apartment search, but she was so thoughtful to think of the bus card and also to bring me to work on my first few days. I can't imagine anything more I can ask from her.

At work, I was welcomed warmheartedly and got the opportunity to work and learn the great standards of the brand hotel. (I'm not sure if I'm allowed to mention its name) One of the brand requirements is that all staff need to smile whenever a guest approaches, but it was so nice working there that the smile came naturally. 

However in the beginning, I did take the bus after work, but after getting acquainted with the associates, most of them were willing to give me a ride after work.

The friendliness is so contagious that I got infected with the friendly-virus. Greeting, saying 'masha danki' and I even gave a ride to a total stranger, who couldn't find the shop she needed to be.
For everyone, who made my internship and stay so memorable, I'd like to say "Thank you!! Masha Danki!! You are one of the reasons Aruba will always have a place in my heart.

What I miss most of this beautiful island:
1. my friends - they introduced me to happy hour, fun in dressing up (for all kinds of events) and the warmth and love of Aruba

2. the free sunsets - The best place to watch the sun go under is at Malmok. You can just park your car there and make yourself comfortable while you watch the sun set.
3. the food options ->  there is a variety of food available. You can grab an affordable big portioned meal at Fermin, a cheap Chinese lunch/dinner at Wing Hung or even a great fine dining experience at Ruth's Chris.  If you're the sport watching type, there are several options ranging from the local bars to Champions. After  hours, there are also some carts at certain areas, where you can get great food for an affordable price. One of them is Mexican. All options depending on the experience you'd like. For more about the food options in Aruba, check my other blog: http://atastybit.blogspot.com/
4. the accessibility - with a car, you can go everywhere yourself. It takes about half an hour to go from high rise area to San Nicolas. That is without traffic. There are a set of roads to go to all areas of Aruba and if you have GPS or Google Maps, you can get everywhere by car.
5. the safety - However Suriname is considered quite safe, Aruba is safer. Of course you should not provoke it, but all in all, I felt like I don't have to be scared to walk around. Just an example of how safe people felt they were: I saw people jogging at the boulevard at 2am.

There are lots more that I miss, but it will make the list too long for a blog.  Have you already been there? What do you miss the most?

My flying experience this vacay

My loyal readers, I'm back!!! A vacation is not only food for my stomach, but also food for my soul. I feel so relaxed and energized now (not really right now, since I'm quite sleepy after a late night movie) and can't wait for the next vacation. Yeah,...love travelling. Can't someone just pay me to travel the world and try out all kinds of food and lodgings?

One thing that's not really likeable is flying. I know that there's not really a way around it, unless you have the same opinion as a guy I met in Aruba, who told me he had been sailing from Boston and was gonna make it a year long trip. For most travels, flying is a necessity and everyone who has to fly a bit further knows the hassle of flying out from Suriname. You have at least one layover, some (can be 9-10hrs) waiting time and then the ignorance of online check-in.

For this trip, I took the matter into my own hands and have booked online. Since I was going to 3 destinations, I glued several airlines to make my ticket price a bit cheaper. SO...for this one trip, I had experience with 5 airlines: SLM, Air Tran, Southwest, JetBlue and Caribbean Airlines.

First was of course SLM. I had earlier experiences with them and the advantage of flying with them to Aruba is:

- it's a direct flight, so shorter travel time
- you always get food ( I believe it's part of being Surinamese)

What I didn't like about them and this time:

- there was a delay of 6 hours and I had to hear it from Travelocity, where they not only mail me about the delay, but someone who couldn't even pronounce Suriname correctly called me to ensure I knew about the delay. I confirmed it by calling the airport and leaving a message at Facebook. And no memo whatsoever on their page about this delay. Real disappointment!
- I checked-in online, printed out my boarding pass and still had to stand in the long line. After some complaints from a colleague traveler, we were put in a different lane, which should've happened from the beginning

Overall, I still would fly with SLM out of convenience, but I just hope they would work on these points though.

It was my first time flying with Air Tran and Southwest, so I was not sure what to expect. I had to connect in Atlanta with Southwest for my final destination. Air Tran was ok. The only thing that was not pleasant and I am not sure which airlines fault it was or just human error, but my luggage didn't arrive with me on my destination.

Southwest on the other hand was an experience like no other and I don't mean in a good way. First of all, at time of departure our flight attendants haven't arrived at the gate yet. The announcer talked about it as if he's talking about the weather or something totally normal. Then during the flight, the flight attendants were constantly chitchatting with guests, which is so different to what I'm used to. I'm not really sure yet about how I feel about it. It's a bit mixed. Partly it's nice to see the flight attendants enjoy themselves, on the other hand, it appears so unprofessional.


JetBlue was really the best airline experience so far!! The price was reasonable, have one free checked luggage per person and there was a list with unlimited snacks and drinks you can choose from. And best of all, TV with nearly all channels and for a flight that's about 3hrs long. The flight attendants were friendly and really service with a smile from the counter to leaving the plane. I would recommend this airline to everyone I know, but unfortunately they only have domestic US flights.

http://www.nydailynews.com/life-style/travel/sirens-skies-flight-attendants-years-gallery-1.46299?pmSlide=1.46355

And there's of course, Caribbean Airlines. The service got better since the last time I flew with them, the state of the interior in the planes got worse, but probably because I didn't expect a lot from them, the overall experience was ok. The only thing that I always hate is the long layover in Trinidad. This time it's 9/10 hours and thank god there's Rituals.

Before I left, I already did some research and read about a VIP lounge, but in which you only gain access through membership or at least introduction by a member. The annual fee for this membership is about $300+ and the introduced one will have to pay $27,- for that one time.

Since we don't know anyone who could be from that club, we were already worried about what to do in 9-10 hours. We lunched at KFC, which I do have to admit is the best KFC I've had so far. The line was so long, but totally worth it. We took our time with every step we had to follow and finally got up to the 1st floor. There was some shops, but only Rituals actually sold something to eat and drink. I saw the couches and I was in love. You know in cartoons, when an object suddenly lights up as if send from heaven. Well, this couch just lighted up in front of me. It looked so comfy (and it is too) and we spend most of our hours here. I felt to thankful that all the TT$ I had left, I put it in their tip box. However it's not mandatory, but I believe everyone who uses this 'facility' should do the same. The ladies are nice and should surely be rewarded for not kicking you out.

My food experiences at all 3 destinations are soon to be read on my other blog: https://atastybit.blogspot.com/

Should marriage be the goal for all couples?

This blog idea started with a post on Facebook, where a friend of mine posted this:

It is one of those quotes/sentences/sayings that seems to be logical, but somewhere deep down it does not feel right.

As a little girl, I grew up with the idea that I would study, get a good job, make some good money, find a good man and get married, then kids and bla bla bla.....The same story I believe everybody must have heard at least once in their lifetime. Most of these so-called supposed-stories or so-called facts created by hopes of our parents or our environment to condition us to think a certain way.

At a certain point of our life, this fairytale bubble will burst and reality shows that marriages are no guarantee for an everlasting relationship like we were told when we were still innocent and sweet.

How many weddings are held in a  year and how many file for divorce within the next year? The figures are so depressing and the environment around us is not always helping. Who can say that they don't know someone who is cheating for their partner? Or couples who have stayed together for so long and break off just months after their wedding. When I hear those stories, I really wondered what went wrong that just a ring and a piece of paper can break the years these people shared.

And no, I am not anti-marriage and I actually believe I will get married eventually. But what I don't agree with the most of that saying, is that when two people come together, their idea should be to get married at the end. As if, if that's not the case, they should not even start. That might apply to arrange marriages, but in this era, where most have freedom of speech and right to choose, I believe people should stay together because it feels right and they choose to be with each other. If both like to seal this with a ring and a legal paper, that's great!

For me, marriage changed from a fairytale to a legal step, which will benefit the next generation. An oath that you make at that moment that everything you two are working for, will be for each other and to create a home for your kids. And that piece of paper and the ring should not change the way you guys were with each other already. You don't owe each other more than you already were: love, trust and honesty!

Longing for vacation!

For those, who know me well, know that I love to travel, but with travel comes expenses and it's not always an easy choice. Do you choose to improve your daily life or do you choose for an experience. Of course you will have the pictures to show for it, but after all, you did pay for an experience. Nobody can tell you in advance how you will experience it and no guarantee that it will be a worthwhile trip. And still.....the idea of going on vacation seems like a world opening up.

For this year, I've already planned my vacation for end of next month. And tickets and arrangements were already done in the beginning of this month. Can you imagine the torture? It's like looking forward to opening Christmas presents and you still have to wait for a certain day or a certain hour or a certain someone to be present before you can do it. Time seems to suddenly stop moving and days go by like months and I can't just wait for the days to pass by quicker and I know for a fact that during my vacation time will pass by so fast that I'd just want to have a remote to hit 'Pause'.

Since I can't do anything about the time, so I'll need to keep myself busy until that day is finally here. And research is surely one of them. Google FTW!!!

This has been keeping me busy lately:

1. Groupon - not all countries are subject for deals, but if your next destination is in the states, you'll surely get some great deals. It range from food to paintball activities. Really diverse and for all ages and all genders something to plan your trip.

2. Since one of the stops is New York, I've been checking out some websites for free stuff to do. I mean, travelling is already very expensive for Surinamese citizens. Why not trying to cut costs? Some of the sites are http://www.nycgo.com/free/ , http://www.niftynyc.com/ and http://www.lonelyplanet.com/usa/travel-tips-and-articles/76493. The troublesome thing about some of the schedules, some of the events are not scheduled way in advance. Mostly it's a month or so, so if you're like me, planning way ahead, you might need to look it up near the time you're leaving.

3. A very nice tool is of course Google Maps. However I have friends there, but sometimes it's good to know in advance how far a certain place is. The addition on Google Maps is the directions and the 3D view. It creates a better view of what to expect.

4. Since I'm such a foodie, I was wondering if I can take on some Man vs. Food challenges. I probably can't eat as much as Adam, but I believe I can take on the heat whenever it's spicy challenges.

5. Making a list of the things I want to do at my vacation spots. There is so much to do, just so little time. More reason for a second trip, right?

Any advice for keeping myself busy while waiting for my departure date, please comment!!

Friends: quality or quantity?

A friend of mine at Facebook got very upset yesterday about some people, who claimed to be  her friends but at the very end stabbed her in her back. It's such a harsh experience, but it happens all the time in life. And of course, everyone's idea of friendship is different. Next to that, there are different types of friends.

You have friends at school/on the work floor, who you can talk about anything in your life, but after school/work, there is just no need to meet. Some friends are the ones you will see once or twice a year and try to catch up. And there are some great friends, who you hardly meet, but whenever you see each other again, it's like old times. I remember an essay, where the author wrote about a type of friends who you love to hate. We all have some of those friends too.


During elementary and secondary school, it was cool to have lots of friends. To always have someone to go out with or to be on the phone with. With time, the group of friends you have seems to shrink and your concept of friendship will also mature. In all these years I have learned this about friendship:

- it's always quality over  quantity
   you can have as many people around you who claims to be your friend, but when you're in trouble, 
   you'll see who your real friends are.
- there is a timeframe for everyone in your life. Some stay longer than others. Cherish those moments!

 

- if the friendship is over, just let it go. There's no use crying over spilled milk

With some friends, the quality of the friendship will change with time. You'll have your own crowd, your own thoughts and if you both are willing to keep this friendship, it will stay. But with some, you don't even need to say a word in a whole year, but whenever you see each other again, even though you're in a different country, a different industry, a totally different life style, you'll stay the best friends you always were.

Why O why, Generation Y?

Lately I've been watching some Hong Kong series. It is quite different from a while back (like 10 years ago)when I used to be a fanatic TVB-fan. The set-up of these series are different, the actors/actresses are younger and seem less experienced and the slang used are so 'new'.

One of the things they talked about that caught my attention was '90 后‘, which means the generation after 1990. They are known by different names: the Millennials, the generation Y. In the series they're posed as the irresponsible, wild and plan-free/worry-free generation. Here are some characteristics of this group based on this article http://itthing.com/4-tell-tale-signs-that-you-are-from-generation-y:



1. tech-savvy
They are the generation that grew up with technology in bloom. Mobile phones and laptops were a necessity and not a choice.

2. attention- seekers

They LOOOOVE attention. Social network sites are a daily need. People need to know what they're doing. When they're sad/happy, they want to share it with the world. At work, they crave for compliments and approval. With friends, they want to be the center of attention.

 

3. Driven, but not so driven

They want financial success to buy all the material luxury: expensive apparel, expensive booze, expensive cars, which they mostly can't afford. Their goal is not to maintain it, their aim is to have it. For instance, if they want to buy a Porsche, they'll try to save money (or some other faster way) for it (some get it from parents), but they will not think about how much they'll need to pay for gas every month.

 

4. Teamwork

They like to work in teams, but due to personal experience, I believe they want to work in a group, so that they will not need to do everything themselves. If it fails it's finger pointing, if it's successful, they share the appraisal.

I do admit that in my direct vicinity,  I do encounter people in this generation and they do seem to have these traits. Overconfident, very assumptious and especially very unfocussed. I had and still have a hard time dealing with them.

They do have some traits that are sure to envy: open-mindedness, more ME-time and the dare-to-love mentality. It might come over as selfish, but what's wrong with a bit more ME-love?

But I see the same traits from people who are in the late 80s and some after 90s are pretty responsible. So does is really has to do with the generation or is it just people at that age?

Looking back at myself in the early 20s I consider myself back then very irresponsible. The first years in the university were so wasted away. The classes were loose: nobody cares if you attend or not. And since it was not a major I preferred I really only took classes that interested me. No idea which direction to choose, what plans to make and how further with my life. What mattered was that moment and what comes will come.

Probably Karma really hits me in the face by showing me the after 90s kids. I used to be the same person, who would procrastinate, making plans to party and doesn't have a care in the world about the things I said. I still kept the straightforwardness, since that's a personal trait. But I believe that I've learned to wait for the right time to say the right things ( not always though). And I actually don't see the wrong thing about it. I love honesty.

During college, I was in a student board. There was this girl, who dislikes me, but I like the way she is. I mean...of course it's not nice not to be liked, but I admire her honesty to show it to me. For me, I prefer a true enemy above a fake friend.

Baby talk

Recently there has been some discussions going between me and several people around me. The big topic is 'baby'!!

Back in the days, it is a natural thing to assume that one day you'll have kids. Nowadays, some people choose to have kids, some accidentally have kids and some choose not to have kids at all. So the big question was: "Why do you choose to have kids?"

About the fact that babies are the most adorable human beings in the world, nobody will deny. But what makes people, who have the choice to choose for kids? Is that the society pressure 'it is expected that every woman will have kids one day' or does every woman really feel the desire to become a mommy at some stage in their life?

Don't get me wrong. One day, I do want to have a baby of my own, but I always expected to have a certain feeling or desire. That one day something will light up or a certain mommy feeling will tingle within me and I'll know that it's time. Or am I the only one who is not having these kind of feelings?

On the contrary, why not have kids? They're adorable, will be a little you composed by the features of you and your loved one. However everybody complains about the sleepless nights and the dirty diapers, but it hasn't kept many from making more. Even moms who has told me nightmare-ish stories about their childbirth experience are willing to confine another one willingly. Why is that?

Does childbirth give people a certain confident or power of creation? That they have a certain feeling that they actually did something god-like...created a human being?

I assume I'll have a lot to research about this topic. When I talked about this with a friend, she even started to doubt about how certain she is about having kids.

In life, we learn most things as part of life: going to school, finding a good job, falling in love, marriage and kids. But how often do we wonder if these are necessities or are these just society requirements?